From the Muck to the Mighty; My Journey with Jesus

  I'm not one to shout warfare all the time, but these last few weeks have been the most interesting I've experienced in a while. I've been having dreams at a rate more frequently than normal for me. Usually, I'm a vision person. I'll see or experience things as I am awake. Lately it's been more dreams, more quiet revelation in the word and more shaking. The Lord is really shaking me up these last few days, to a point that has made me very uncomfortable with where I am in life. There is a shaking going on, and things are falling away.  In this dream, I was in a large church. It was worn down but beautiful. It reminded me of an old high school auditorium. I was lining up chairs in the front row on the left side facing the stage. The chairs were spread apart and out of order. One by one, I lined them up and connected them together. There was one chair that was set to the side. It was in the isle and had not been used in a very long time. One of the legs was bent, ...

The Lord spoke strongly to me today “Stop putting on dirty clothes, Ash” as I was getting out of the shower and wanted to grab my cozy t shirt. I had just worn it for a bit and taken off to shower. It wasn’t filthy, I hadn’t worn it for long but those words felt convicting. So I grabbed my towel, tossed that shirt in the wash and went to put something new on.  Then the Lord put it on my heart that putting on dirty clothes is exactly what many of us do every day. We go to church, we worship, we pray, we may even go up to the altar call and lay down on our faces before the Lord. We cry out for revival, for a fresh fire, for His presence and we walk right out of that church and right back into our mess. I know, I did it for years. It’s time to stop.  It’s time to stop the old ways, to stop putting on your dirty clothes. Yes it may seem familiar, comfortable and like it’s fits just right, like it’s worn in just for you; but it’s smelly, it’s stained with the past and the Lord desi...

  There is a call to action detailed in the scriptures that I can't seem to shake from my mind. I truly believe this lack of action we see in today's world, is one of the biggest problems we face. We are in the times of Bible prophecy coming to fulfillment. Look At Matthew 24:32-34 “32 From the fig tree learn its lesson: as soon as its branch becomes tender and puts out its leaves, you know that summer is near. 33 So also, when you see all these things, you know that he is near, at the very gates. 34 Truly, I say to you, this generation will not pass away until all these things take place.” In Scripture, the fig tree is symbolic of the nation of Israel. I believe the tender branch and leaves coming forth are a reference to Israel’s rebirth and the reacquisition of the city of Jerusalem. Israel became a nation again in 1948, but it did not retake Jerusalem until 1967. So, when it says that the generation that “shall see all these things,” is it talking about the nation’s rebirth...

 I’ve been struggling to write this past week. Struggling to be myself. Struggling to catch my breath. I’ve felt out of my comfort zone quite a bit. I’ve been trying to put my head on straight and trying to take the emotion out of life. To be sensible, make good decisions and stay on the right path. The one the Lord has for me.  Yet every time I take a giant step forward the enemy comes clawing at me trying to drag me back. Trying to cause insecurity to rise up, filing my head with thoughts of doubt. Plaguing my plans with sickness, unexpected costs, and throwing a wrench right into the wheel I had spinning so perfectly, or so I thought. So here I am needing to practice what I preach. Needing to spend more time in the word and less time in the world pondering the what if’s of every decision I’ve ever made. Growth is painful, change is scary, even when you know it’s for the best. You can see the good in the future but it means loosing the comfort of control and the security of ...

  The Lord spoke something very plain to me during the prayer meeting at church last night. "Offense, Ash". I saw a vision of a soccer field with the Lord as the goalie.  I was standing on the field with a team standing in position, but being still. As if they were standing idle waiting for someone to kick them the ball. Across the field, I saw an opposing team handling the ball. I wanted to rush at them, but I felt the urge to stay back with my team. I was confused as to why we were standing still just waiting for the opposition to rush us before we act. I wanted to be in the action. I wanted to move! The funny thing was that they weren't even rushing us or trying to score. They were acting as if we didn't exist. Then I saw a third team that appeared on that far side of the field. All of a sudden there was game play, but we weren't included. The two teams at the end of the field were in an all out brawl, while still acting like we weren't even there. "It...

  Are you prepared for anything? There have been two things the Lord has been working on in my heart over the last few years. One has been patience and the other has been to be led by spirit at all costs. Especially when it makes your flesh uncomfortable. Today I want to talk about being led by the Spirit at the cost of our flesh.  Jesus was mocked, tortured, and hung on a cross to die. Yet many Christians won’t step out of their comfort zones to obtain the freedom He died for. We won’t go up for altar call. We won’t lay our problems at His feet. We will bottle everything up, enjoy that 20 minute sermon and struggle internally for another week. We are afraid of what others will think of us. We are afraid that we will be judged for our sin, for our struggles, for being weak. We are afraid to admit that we need help. So we struggle. Month after month, year after year, slowly dying inside with the enemy’s poison contaminating our souls and seeping into our every day life.  W...

 I get that I’m the crazy mom. The one with too many rules. The one that thinks “everything’s a demon” and the one that is the only mom that doesn’t give her kid her own phone number and can still read her texts. I get that not everyone understands the spiritual warfare that actually goes on in this world. I’m crazy for saying horoscopes are witchcraft, I’m crazy for saying don’t dress up for Halloween. I’m crazy because they’re just kids and let them have some fun. I’m the mean mom because I wouldn’t let Leah act out a play with her friends because I saw it had murdering in it through watching her texts. I’m sorry but no, you shouldn’t be acting out crime scene murders at the age of 10. Game or no game. I’ll be that mean mom. Consider this. There are so many things we don’t know anything about. Think about car shows and racing. Those folks that are into that can tell you all the specs, the track info, they know the backgrounds of all the other drivers and their strengths and weakn...

  It's been an interesting few months since the last retreat in April. I don't think I can remember a time in my walk where I have felt such an up and down roller coater of emotions. I have been stepping out more, sharing more of what is on my heart. My desire is simple, to share the love of Jesus, to share the true gospel of repentance and to set the world a blaze with the same Holy Spirit fire that burns within my spirit. The Lord is always speaking to me, calling me out of my comfort zone. On the long drive home from that meeting last Friday I was praying with gratitude that I am able to see such miracles, to experience the presence of the Lord to that degree. As I was thanking Him for the ability to go to these meetings, I heard a simple phrase that simultaneously threw gasoline on the fire within me and scared my flesh making me sick to my stomach. "Be the meeting, Ash" That simple phrase, felt too big for me. It felt out of reach but at home within my spirit all...

  Don't be caught in the almost. There will come a time where almost will not count. During prayer last night in church I had a vision. I saw a highway, it was two lanes going the same direction. The highway was packed with people that were walking steadily together. The sign overhead read "Eternity".  What I noticed first was the appearance of everything being in black and white. It reminded me of an old TV show from the 50's. As I looked over the crowd spanning miles down the road, I noticed that there was nothing else in sight. No grass, no ground, just a one way highway full of people suspended over an endless pit of darkness. The Lord spoke one sentence to my heart "Time is running out, Ash." As my frame of reference panned out, I saw the highway begin to narrow. As it narrowed, many of these people who were walking forward, blindly following the crowd, were falling right off the edge and into the darkness below. It was like they were oblivious to what ...

  I didn't get much sleep last night, or for the last week, or two, or ten. If you are a prophetic person or an intercessor and have tips on how to sleep, kindly toss them my way. It's seems that over the last few months I have been sleeping for about two hours and then waking up, non stop, every night. I usually don't dream or if I do, I don't remember them. This morning was a change of pace. I finally was able to lay down and relax at about 4:30am. I knew I had to wake up early to do some IT work today so my dread of the 6am alarm was looming. As I finally fell asleep I was blessed with a dream that I can actually recall. I believe there is a really good message here so I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to share this with you. I was in a room, it looked to be a garage or pavilion where a large gathering was taking place. It was open to the outside and open to the public, I could feel the fresh air blowing through that area. I knew there were a large number of people...

  I've been struggling recently with this stirring in my Spirit. This longing to have a deeper revelation of the word, paired with the busyness of the world found in working, being a mom, and trying to fit everything else in-between. I've been struggling with feeling unsettled, wondering what's next, and I heard the Lord speak to me "Don't be that bunny, Ash". As I heard that phrase settle into my spirit, I saw a picture of a chocolate Easter bunny. It looked so nice. It was detailed, you could see the fur, the eyes, ears, nose and mouth. You could see the cotton tail and there was a flower necklace around it. It reminded me so much of the ones you would see on Easter morning in your basket as the "main event". It looked like it would be so sweet and that it would melt in your mouth.  It was in the Lord's hand sitting on the palm of it. The next thing I knew, His hand was removed from under it's perfect peace. It fell to the floor and it shat...

  As I lowered my head to pray in church last night the Lord blessed me with a vision. The music was playing softly in the background, as everyone was praying I began to see myself dancing. Now I'm not much of a dancer, so I just let this all happen in my head to avoid any embarrassment in the flesh. As I was hearing everyone pray, I couldn't. I couldn't petition, I couldn't beg for my own outcomes to be done in His circumstances. I tried, and prayed in the spirit for a bit, but this peace and joy rose up in me that had me bursting at the seams. I saw myself dancing among a crowd of people who were downtrodden, burdened and sorrowed. As much as I wanted to relate to their feelings to "fit in" and do what was "right" in that time, I couldn't. I was overwhelmed with His love, His peace, His joy, and all I could do was lift my hands in praise to the Lord who controls it all. As I struggled to relate to what I was seeing, I heard the Lord speak ...