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207. Living in the Valley

When things in life don't go as planned, when we feel overwhelmed and emotional, when we feel like we are drowning in life; we have to stand on the goodness of God. We have to stand on the fact that He is Good. We have to stand firm in our faith that better days will come. We have to understand that our faith indeed moves mountains; even if all we can muster up in the moment, is an amount of faith equivalent to a mustard seed, or a single tear running down our face as we cry out Abba, Father.

We have to understand that we don't pass through the valley of the shadow of death, but that we live there. Whether we like it or not, I think most of us can agree on the fact that this world seems to be going "down hill" at a steady rate. At least as far back as we can remember our parents and grandparents saying the same thing. It seems as this world continues to decline, get worse, divide or altogether fall apart; time keeps moving.

With or without our participation in this life, time keeps moving. With or without your participation in your relationship with the Lord, time keeps moving. As Pastor Harry would say, "We are in His story", our role that we play in His story, is solely up to us and the level of effort we are willing to put in.

I was standing in the kitchen praying about a thousand scenarios that are on my mind. Things I want to scream about, cry about, hide about (I should be stronger than this) or all out quit ministry over (in a bratty sarcastic way, not in a real way, calm down lol). Heaviness, discouragement, suicidal thoughts, feelings of failure, they all were things I've been able to defeat and be delivered from in the past, all bombarding me again. Digging in deeper over the course of the last few weeks. Things that have progressively gotten worse since I've moved to Uniontown. Things that have been rubbing like sandpaper, have progressively rubbed first degree burns into my spiritual skin. The spiritual atmosphere here is chaos and more often than not, I've found myself wanting to cry out to the Lord but feeling as if duct tape is over my mouth.

It's funny how I used to live in the MonValley, often referring to it as death valley; and now the Lord is showing me that we truly are living in the valley of the shadow of death here in Uniontown. Uniontown, sitting at the literal base of a mountain stained with the blood of war, a literal valley in the shadow of death; and many Christians, bound and walking aimlessly in bondage, making this wrong turn and that wrong turn, only to end up back on the same path with no real direction, wondering which way is "out" but not sure what to get "out" from, a figurative or circumstantial valley of the shadow of death.

As I stood in the kitchen I felt the air change, I felt the fresh wind on my face, cold. The ground beneath my feet felt like a flat, rocky, grassy mixture; and to my left and to my right I saw mountains. The sky was dark and overcast, like before a thunderstorm, and after sunset at the same time. That dark gray overcast that came with a foreboding. That constant on edge feeling of apprehension filling the air, suffocating me with every breath I tried to take. As I looked out, I saw hundreds like me. Walking in the darkness, looking for the way out. Finding myself time blind and not even realizing how long I've been here wandering myself.

I felt something come behind me and slip a cloth over my mouth, like a fabric version of duct tape, no matter how much I tried to cry out, my voice was frozen. As I struggled to cry out the Lord showed me that so many of his children are walking in this valley. So many of his prophets are under spiritual attack, feeling muzzled, feeling restricted and feeling like the direction they thought they thought they were headed has been turned completely upside down. With every step I took I felt more unsure of which direction to go. The haze grew darker and the sound of howls, growls and snarls could be heard on the mountainsides. As I continued walking, gasping for breath, my feet were stepping over the bones and bodies of those who have died here. I felt something come behind me and slip another cloth over my eyes. I could barely see a thing. And just like that the enemy had me as his prey. I felt confused, I felt disoriented, I felt frustrated, I felt suffocated and I felt alone. These are the ways the enemy will kill steal and destroy.

What we don't realize is that the devil is smart, his demons are highly trained and they have perfected their craft over thousands and thousands of years. I on the other hand have 39 years in the flesh and 3 with the Holy Spirit. What I myself often fall prey to are the sly mini attacks that come to steal my peace. What many churches and ministers fail to recognize are the sly sneaky mini attacks that demons create because they know how to get to you, they have studied you your whole life. I think many people who are seasoned Christians would probably say the same thing. We fall prey to these attacks from the enemy that manifest in the forms of anxiety, depression, anger, frustration, selfishness, entitlement, jealousy, gossip, back biting, comparison, greed, temptation, etc... not realizing that these small attacks are placing blindfolds on our eyes, effecting how we navigate, or on our mouths negatively filtering the words that come out of our mouths; or both. We need to recognize the demonic aspect of things and fight accordingly. It's time to find out where we aren't fully submitted to the Lord and get submitted. It's time to get ourselves out of the wilderness.

I heard the Lord say "Speak life", and with the power of His Holy Spirit, as I opened my mouth to say Jesus, the cloth fell from my lips. I began to worship Him and proclaim His name in that darkness. I saw a candlelight appear, and the filtered cloth was burned from my eyes. The small light, that came from one person changed the atmosphere. The gray began to lift. The others that were lost, began coming toward the light, even through the cloth that covered their eyes, the light was bright enough to change their direction.

You have no idea who is looking for your light to get them out of their valley.

When we let these things get to us the only answer is more Jesus. It's more of the word, it's more truth, it's more worship, it's more prayer, it could even be more fasting. The answer is always us needing to give more on our end. To actually practice what we preach. To read the scriptures. To actually worship the Lord with our hearts and actions and not only our words.

It's easy to find ourselves caught off guard by the enemy, make sure it's easier to get yourself back on track and in the right mindset in Christ. They're looking for your light. How much of a role do you want to play in the Lords story? It will go on with or without you.

Isaiah 42:16 - And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known: I will make darkness light before them, and crooked things straight. These things will I do unto them, and not forsake them.

Matthew 4:16 - The people which sat in darkness saw great light; and to them which sat in the region and shadow of death light is sprung up.

John 8:12 - Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: he that follows me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.

John 1:5 - And the light shines in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.

Matthew 5:14 - Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.

1 Peter 2:9 - But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvelous light:

Isaiah 58:8 - Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the LORD shall be thy reward.

Ephesians 6:12 - For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

Ephesians 6:11 - Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

James 4:7 - Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Psalms 84:11 - For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly.

The Lord Is My Shepherd Psalm 23
23 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters.
3 He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life,
and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.


  

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