From the Muck to the Mighty; My Journey with Jesus

  I've been struggling recently with this stirring in my Spirit. This longing to have a deeper revelation of the word, paired with the busyness of the world found in working, being a mom, and trying to fit everything else in-between. I've been struggling with feeling unsettled, wondering what's next, and I heard the Lord speak to me "Don't be that bunny, Ash". As I heard that phrase settle into my spirit, I saw a picture of a chocolate Easter bunny. It looked so nice. It was detailed, you could see the fur, the eyes, ears, nose and mouth. You could see the cotton tail and there was a flower necklace around it. It reminded me so much of the ones you would see on Easter morning in your basket as the "main event". It looked like it would be so sweet and that it would melt in your mouth.  It was in the Lord's hand sitting on the palm of it. The next thing I knew, His hand was removed from under it's perfect peace. It fell to the floor and it shat...

  As I lowered my head to pray in church last night the Lord blessed me with a vision. The music was playing softly in the background, as everyone was praying I began to see myself dancing. Now I'm not much of a dancer, so I just let this all happen in my head to avoid any embarrassment in the flesh. As I was hearing everyone pray, I couldn't. I couldn't petition, I couldn't beg for my own outcomes to be done in His circumstances. I tried, and prayed in the spirit for a bit, but this peace and joy rose up in me that had me bursting at the seams. I saw myself dancing among a crowd of people who were downtrodden, burdened and sorrowed. As much as I wanted to relate to their feelings to "fit in" and do what was "right" in that time, I couldn't. I was overwhelmed with His love, His peace, His joy, and all I could do was lift my hands in praise to the Lord who controls it all. As I struggled to relate to what I was seeing, I heard the Lord speak ...

  Who am I? It's a question that to this day, boggles my mind. Over the decades (yikes, decades) of my life, there have been many different versions of who I believed I was. Some I was happy to be, some not so much. Yet every day of the past brought be to where I am at this point right now. I'm sure all of us can look back on periods of our past and wonder "What was I thinking?!" or better yet "How am I still alive?!" We don't get it, but He does. There was a purpose for your past. Luckily the Lord doesn't see who we were in our mistakes, He only sees who He designed us to be from the start. He sees our past, present and future all at once. We are not a surprise to Him. He knew exactly what He was getting into with us. He knew every temptation we would face and He faced them all with us, even when we refused to acknowledge His presence, or even His existence in our lives.  When you look in the mirror what do you see? Do you see your flaws? Do you see...

  My mind has been in a whirlwind lately. I've been busy with work, with the kids, with helping for Leah's party and coming back home from a ministry weekend in NY. I always struggle when I get home from events and traveling. I love having that community feeling, that every moment dedicated to the Lord feeling. When I get back home, isolated and thrown back into the world of working and life in general, it's like a crash of loneliness and isolation. It's like I don't belong here and the more I try to fit in, the more I desire to break away and live out of a backpack on a beach somewhere. The enemy has a way of making us feel as if we need to fit in with this world. To blend in and not make waves. To stand idly by while the world crashes and burns, while peoples homes are on hell fire, and we stand outside looking in the windows waiting for them to wake up and walk out of the burning flames. Kevin used that analogy in one of his teachings on evangelism and it hit hom...

Do you understand the power of now? The power in the fact that this present moment, is the only one we have. Seconds turn into minutes, turn into hours, turn into days. We can make plans for the future, but all we really have is this moment right now.  Are you ok with being rejected for the Lord? Will you put yourself out there no matter what happens, no matter how you look or feel, for the sake of someone else’s salvation?  These two questions might not seem like they relate but I’ll tie them together for you real quick. As I was leaving Walmart today I saw an older man pushing his cart. I was loaded up in the car with Nash buckled and we had already pulled out to leave. As I drove away I felt this gut punch from the Holy Spirit to go talk to him. My flesh didn’t wanna. So like many of us selfish Christians do, I began to pray for him. “Lord please be with that man, show him your love…” right then I was interrupted by the Lord with a stern “that’s what you’re there for, Ash.”...

 I’ve wanted to blog more about this weekend but I don’t really know where to start. My heart breaks for the lukewarm church, for the lukewarm Christians that don’t know the Holy Spirit. It breaks for the churches that are dead. It breaks for the souls that won’t be saved simply from their pride, arrogance, and inability to recognize the demonic influence over this earth. As a seer, I’m well aware of the darkness that lurks in the shadows of your anger, your anxiety, your frustration, your fighting, your division, your sickness, pain, isolation, addictions, suicidal thoughts etc.  I also see what the Lord put in each and every one of us. All different, all gifted, all chosen for such a time as this. I see the beauty in the person you just flipped off. I see the anger and pain behind the Facebook comment arguments. I see the loneliness, abuse and rejection behind the troll, or the fear and control behind the Karen. Yet what I don’t see, is the ability for us to look past the fl...

  I arrived in NY Friday afternoon to begin a weekend evangelism conference. As the music continued playing I felt the urge to go up and worship at the altar. As I was kneeling, I was hit with a wave of emotions. My eyes were closed, and my hands were lifted as the Lord revealed a vision of a lake. It was dark, the water was choppy and I saw a boat coming out through the fog. It was storming, and as the waves became more intense the boat was tossed relentlessly. As the wind picked up, there was a sudden flash of lightning and the boat immediately caught fire as it was struck.  I began to see people jumping from the boat into the dark and violent water of the lake. I saw children drowning. I saw people trying desperately to cling to the base of the ship. I smelled flesh burning. I saw people crying out in agony. The looks on their faces were terrifying.  My gaze shifted to the middle of the lake. There was Jesus. Walking on the water. Calmly, swiftly, walking toward the sh...