46. How Simple it Would Be 01.05.20

46. I’ve watched a series through an app called The Chosen. It’s the story of Jesus and his disciples. It’s a tv series told in a very real way that makes you feel as if you were there. It’s crazy to me how simple of a decision it would be to be able to look Jesus in the eyes, to hear his spoken words and then forsake all you own to follow him. It would be a no brainer. If Jesus himself stood on your front porch and knocked on your door speaking the words of Luke 18, how many of you would follow him?

Luke 18:22 NIV
22 When Jesus heard this, he said to him, “You still lack one thing. Sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”

Why do so many of us wait? What are you waiting for? As a matter of fact, He’s not even asking you to forsake everything you have. He’s only asking for your time, for your heart. If you seek Him, He will reveal himself to you. It will be as if he is standing right next to you, leading you and guiding you. It will be as if you are seeing the world through His eyes. Eyes of love and understanding. I’m no one special, I’m a sinner, I’m imperfect, there’s nothing that makes me any better than any one of you reading this. As a matter of fact, I was probably way worse than many of you. The good new is, if I can be changed through the love of Jesus, so can ALL of you. Our Lord loves us ALL the exact same amount. His relationship with you depends on how you seek him.

You don’t change yourself and then find Jesus. You seek Jesus and He changes YOU.

With everything that is going on in the world today, the way America itself has turned away from the Lord, pushing him out of our schools, pushing his doctrine out of churches to keep membership/tithing up, pushing Him out of theology even; how much longer do you think the Lord will tolerate the America that’s become more like Sodom and Gomorrah, the America that’s become like the days of Noah?

It doesn’t always make me happy to share these messages when I get them. I know I’m looked at like I’m off my rocker. I know I’m judged by people when I walk in a room. It’s not a lie or a secret that the Ashley of a year ago was a very different Ashley. One who used to sprinkle the F word into my sentences like it was sprinkles on a cake. One who sinned more than many of you combined. One who had a temper and a tongue that could burn you from miles away. The one that carried demons inside of her like Dora the explorers backpack, one for every situation that could arise.

It’s not easy to change your life and turn away from the sins you’ve been accustomed to, but I can assure you it’s a necessity to repent. It’s not easy to go to a restaurant and not order half my body weight in fruity alcoholic drinks, it’s not easy not to go smoke a bowl when I get stressed or feel lonely. It’s not easy to fast and take time out of the day to read and look up scripture. It’s surely not easy to lose friends and have family members accuse you of being crazy. It’s not easy to turn away from sex outside of marriage. Its not easy to realize that you’re demonized and to go through deliverance. It’s not easy to give up what the Lord leads me to give up, especially sugar. Here’s the good part though.

I don’t sit up crying feeling like a discarded bag of garbage on the side of the road anymore. I don’t spend my days wishing I was someone else, somewhere else or wishing that my children had a better mother anymore. Here I am, eyes wide open, sober, depression free for the first time in over 35 years, non medicated by doctor or self, aside from my thyroid meds. Here I stand finally happy, with a semi healthy self image, my body being treated as my temple, firm boundaries set, understanding self respect for the first time in my life, head held high looking to the Lord for direction and hearing his voice as I seek him. I’ve been led to new friends and new mentors. I’ve found true inner peace for the first time in my entire life and I refuse to shut up about it. I refuse to stand here healed and set free keeping this to myself like it’s some secret that I’m capable of while others remain in bondage. I also refuse to return to my sins. I can’t go back to who I used to be, no matter how crazy it makes me look. The taste of freedom is too sweet, the relationship I have with Jesus means more to me than any physical relationship, any material possession, or any fleshly desire ever could. So call me crazy, to me it’s worth it.

So here I am typing all of this on Facebook, treating it like a dear diary for no reason other than to make you think a little differently about your own salvation and what it’s worth to you. To share with you not only the Love of Jesus but the reverential fear and awe of the Lord our God and the necessity to keep his Word and repent of sin. To share my experiences with the Holy Spirit as my guide. To show you how attainable all of this is to EVERYONE. You don’t need a theology degree, you don’t need to study for years, you only need to seek your own relationship with the Lord with all your heart. It’s that simple. If you knew tomorrow that the world was coming to an end, would you crack open your Bible and turn off your tv? Would you pray? Would you repent on behalf of our nation for every sin that has kept us all in bondage knowingly and unknowingly? Would you fear?

We are currently in a situation where many of our military are being deployed to fight battles for America. The sad truth is that not all of them will return home to their families. We all need to be in the state of mind of having our lamps lit and waiting at the gate. You don’t know when your last hour, minute or second will be. You don’t know when our Master will return. Why wait? Jesus is calling you now more than ever.

Luke 12:40
Be ye therefore ready also: for the Son of man cometh at an hour when ye think not.

I invite you to read Isaiah 43, it’s too long to post it all. 43:1 ends with “Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine.”

He will call you by name as you are His. However, we have to be careful to keep His Word in its entirety and not to pick and choose scripture that makes us feel all ooey gooey inside all the time. Would there be a chance that He says He never knew you? Are you willing to take that risk?

Matthew 7:21-23 New King James Version (NKJV)
I Never Knew You
21 “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. 22 Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ 23 And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’

Change is not something that can be obtained overnight. It’s a process, sometimes it’s a long one. It’s a commitment to turn away from everything that you know is wrong as well as the things that the Lord is leading you to sacrifice. Is there such a thing as a human being free from sin? No, I don’t believe so. As long as we are flesh on earth we will struggle with sin (myself included). As you make the changes you’re led to make and turn from things that you know are wrong, you’ll be led to a revelation of the Word. You’ll be led to a closeness with the Lord our God as well as Jesus Christ our Savior through the Holy Spirit that you never thought was possible. If I can do it, anyone can. What are you waiting for?