28. Internal Struggle 11.14.19

28. It’s been quiet lately, these past few days have been emotionally trying to say the least. Dealing with internal struggle isn’t always easy. All too often we have a bad day, or week, or month and it becomes easy to fall into past patters of behavior such as depression, anxiety, fear or worry. These things don’t automatically disappear when you become born again or baptized with the Holy Spirit. They simply become a different type of battle you fight using different weapons. You recognize them as an outward attack on your mind and not an inward battle of you against yourself.

Instead of a physical battle fought with Motrin, anti depressants, chocolate, a box of tissues and a heating pad; it becomes a spiritual battle you fight using the helmet of Salvation along with the sword of the Spirit. When you put on the helmet of Salvation you’re protecting your mind and thoughts from the manipulation of evil influences. When you yield the sword of the Spirit, you’re using the word of The Lord God to help discern your thoughts. The word will assist you to see and speak the truth in your situation to defeat the enemy’s attack. The need for Motrin and a heating pad to alleviate physical pain can still be there, but the emotional and mental spiral, the unnecessary tears and feelings of insignificance, the why do I have to go through this, and the mental breakdown that will accompany the difficult situation you’re going through can all be handled in a different way. You don’t have to lose your peace anymore.

You simply have to make the choice to put on the helmet. It’s an action. The Lord may be your father but he’s not going to dress you in His armor himself like you’re a two year old getting ready for picture day. If you’re old enough to have your own opinions and do things your own sinful fleshy way, He’s going going to treat you as if you’re old enough to dress yourself. He’s not going to slap the helmet of Salvation down on your head, give you a pat on the rear and say go get em tiger. He expects you to use what He has given you, and all of us, but it’s up to YOU to take what is given to you and to use it appropriately. I can give you a hundred bucks but until you actually come and take it from my hand, it will remain in my hand, useless to you. If you want it, if you want to be able to use it for your own good, your action to take it from me must first be completed. If you’d be willing to get in your car and make the effort to drive to my home and take a hundred bucks out of my hand to help with your bills, or if you’re willing to wait 10 hours in line on Black Friday to save a few hundred bucks, but you aren’t willing to make the effort to crack a Bible for your eternal salvation, you might be who I’m trying to reach here.

Deuteronomy 20:4 - For the LORD your God is he that goeth with you, to fight for you against your enemies, to save you.

Ephesians 6:17 - And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

Hebrews 4:12 - For the word of God [is] quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and [is] a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.

Isaiah 30:15 - For thus saith the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength

Quietness and confidence. Those are your strength. Far too many people today think that acting like it’s open mic night at the trap house is the way to get your point across. Protesting and rioting in the streets. Making as much noise and nonsense as you can to ensure that you’re heard, that you’re found to be in the right and that everyone knows it. Your need to convince others to agree with you far surpasses the moral compass you should be operating in. Can we please give it a rest? If you are right, your views are just and you have the morals of the Lord backing your viewpoint you don’t need to make noise. The Lord will hear your cry and help you fight your battles.

1 John 3:22 - And whatsoever we ask, we receive of him, because we keep his commandments, and do those things that are pleasing in his sight.

Proverbs 28:26 - He that trusteth in his own heart is a fool: but whoso walketh wisely, he shall be delivered.

I was praying and asking the Lord why it’s been so quiet lately and he gently but firmly reminded me to practice what I preach. He reminded me to not seek comfort in food and sweets when I’m upset and that I need to come to him (regardless of what time of the month it is). He also reminded me that I am praying to wash the windows when my LEGO table was ready to be cleaned. He likes to comically use my own messages against me to make His point.

I already had a message He wanted me to convey but I was trying to get around it. So it got quiet. I didn’t want to do what I was directed, I wanted another task. I wanted another message. He gently put me on the shelf until I decided to do the thing.

Numbers 12:6 - And he said, Hear now my words: If there be a prophet among you, [I] the LORD will make myself known unto him in a vision, [and] will speak unto him in a dream.

See, I don’t necessarily enjoy being this dooms day, evil is everywhere you look type of preacher person. I’m not going to be a fan favorite sharing these types of messages. I thought I’d be able to use my gift to ward off darkness and help lead people to deliverance through repentance. I didn’t really think that everywhere I turned I’d be seeing visions, getting warnings and being taunted by the darkness that once consumed me as a warning to humanity. Yet here I am. The words I keep hearing in my mind are “Because you can handle it.” Over and over playing in my mind from the Lord. Does that make it easy, No. Is it even fun, not always. Is it necessary, Yes.

Habakkuk 2:2-3 2. And the LORD answered me, and said, Write the vision, and make [it] plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it. 3. For the vision [is] yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.

1 John 4:1 - Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world.

Once the enemy loses his grip, he will scramble to get it back. Once the enemy realizes someone he lost his grip on is able to expose the way he operates to the world, the enemy will attack even harder. Once the enemy realizes that the person he lost his grip on is determined to save others and bring them to Jesus Christ in the process, the enemy will attack with everything in his power. He might even show up face to face in your own home ready to fight for your soul right there in your living room on a Monday night. No warning.

No one really talks about the way that many Christians and true to the word church leaders are constantly demonically attacked. The simple goal of the enemy being to derail their passion for sharing the true word of Christ. No one wants to talk about the way that fear, jealousy, criticism, pride or greed can take a demonic stronghold on certain churches or members of churches and the word spread in those churches becomes more theatrical and less scripture based. The tithe and attendance becomes the basis of the church, the truth of the word falls to the wayside as to not offend the biggest contributors, not to make waves. That’s a win for the enemy, a win for the enemy right in the Christian church, and no one wants to see it. No one wants to believe the enemy can be in the church or affecting Christians. We are Spirit, soul and body. The devil and his demons can attack two of the three. Yep, even in Christians.

2 Timothy 4:3 - For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears;

The devil doesn’t play nice. Your Spirit as a born again Christian is sealed in Christ, but your soul and body are still able to be attacked. Your mind, will, emotions and physical body are still fair game for the devil and his influence as long as you are on this earth. The earth is the devils second home, like a vacation home. The enemy visits earth looking for wonderful souls to take back as trinkets to decorate his first home, the pit. The same way that we shop for souvenirs at the beach the enemy visits earth shopping for souls. A subtle browse, a walk around, maybe picking up a few things and holding them in his evil hand, inspecting them then placing them back, looking for the perfect addition to his home decor. The devil also has an army of those black tar demons that will slither into any crack you leave open in your life. They start by manipulating one little area of your mind, your will, your emotions, your attitudes, your physical health, and the next thing you know, you’re the perfect trinket. Hand selected by the enemy himself and taken home to be trapped inside the crawling seething walls of the pit.

Revelation 12:9 - And the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him.

Acts 26:18 - To open their eyes, [and] to turn [them] from darkness to light, and [from] the power of Satan unto God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins, and inheritance among them which are sanctified by faith that is in me.

1 John 2:8-11 - Again, a new commandment I write unto you, which thing is true in him and in you: because the darkness is past, and the true light now shineth.

There are many times when we become frustrated because we can’t see what is coming next. I was a thousand percent a control freak. I hated not knowing, I hated changed plans, I hated not being 100% prepared for every second of every day. I had to know the plan and if something derailed my plan, or plans changed last minute, it literally felt like my whole world was falling apart. I had so much underlying fear, anxiety, dread, perceived rejection and worry that it consumed every ounce of my energy. My default reaction to stress brought on by change was anger and cleaning. I was under the impression if I could control the outcome and if I was prepared for what was coming next, that everything would go smoothly, the kids would have a better day, people would like me more, life would flow and things would be good as gravy. I thought that if I could control every aspect of our day, that if I was prepared for any challenge we might face during the day, that nothing bad could happen to us. It’s funny how as moms, we make sure there are snacks, drinks, a change of clothes, extra socks, extra shoes, a jacket, the car has gas in it, the weather is ok, we have wiper fluid, we have extra diapers, we have wipes, we have a Walmart bag incase someone gets car sick. We look at and cover all of these things for our children for a quick trip down the road to the grocery store, yet we won’t open a Bible and read it to our kids and prepare them for what the world they’re growing up in is really like. They’re all going to be adults one day. We can’t blame the younger generation for this mess we are all living in if we refuse to impart the fruits of the Spirit to this new generation.

Galatians 5:22-23 King James Version (KJV)
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

Isaiah 45:6-7 - That they may know from the rising of the sun, and from the west, that [there is] none beside me. I [am] the LORD, and [there is] none else.

We will not hold back as parents to “educate” them on what we want them to think about other people or other races, other countries, other religions, political affiliations, what clothes are in style and what clothes aren’t, what cars are cool and which ones aren’t, who it’s ok to sit by at lunch and who to shun based on economic status. We want to say there are bullying problems in schools, or that there are problems with the inner city kids, that it’s a generational issue, that it’s a gang or violence issue. When in reality what it is, is a Parenting issue. It’s a lack of Biblical moral teachings being included in our schools. It’s a push for higher test scores and more pressure and growing up. When, in reality, it should be a push for an increase in morality, learning your individual strengths, improving on your individual weaknesses, learning how to come together as a community and support the needs of others less fortunate. It should be a push for every citizen and person of the world to be able to walk with their head held high, faces gleaming with purpose and an inner joy to just be who the Lord God made them to be. Let us teach love, acceptance, patience, kindness and let us encourage hard work and determination. We will either rise or fall as one nation under God. Like it or not.

Ephesians 6:4 - And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord

3 John 1:4 - I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.

Psalms 127:3 - Lo, children [are] an heritage of the LORD: [and] the fruit of the womb [is his] reward.

1 Thessalonians 5:9 - For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ,

Sorry, I got side tracked with a little rant there. Back to what I was saying regarding not seeing what is coming. I was driving down 857 (similar to 201 for my BV folks) on my way home, I was going the average speed and there was a pick up truck in front of me that was hauling a trailer that had some mowers and other equipment attached. The truck needed to make a left hand turn. It appeared to me that nothing was coming toward us. As he slowed to a stop, his blinker signaling for that left turn, I kept approaching the truck at my regular speed. I thought to myself there’s nothing coming, I have time, he will be turning, I’ll slow down then speed back up as he turns and not even need my brakes. As I approached the truck, still stopped, I began to get a little frustrated. Why was he not turning left?

I let off the gas and expected to do a rolling stop as he did his left turn but he was still patiently sitting there stopped with his signal on. My car kept approaching and my flesh began to get a little more frustrated, why is this guy stopped?, there’s nothing coming, I see no head lights coming toward us, it’s dark, there’s nothing there, just go! As I lifted my foot from the gas and moved it slowly toward the brake, I thought to myself, really, this guy is messing with my miles per gallon and making me use my brakes when nothing is coming this is ridiculous. I began to push the brake petal down and as I got closer to stopping behind the trailer attached to the pick up, I saw it. Another car, coming toward us in the dark with no head lights on. I didn’t see the danger coming. I was right behind the truck getting more frustrated by the minute because even this close I couldn’t see what danger was there.

I was frustrated that the person who did see what was coming had stopped. I had no idea anything was there, I had no idea there was any danger approaching at all. Because I was blind to it.

Similarly the cars behind me and farther back were frustrated, each driver also not able to see the reason for the stop. Then the Lord put it on my heart that this is where the world is today. There is a great danger coming right at us in a way that some are just not able to see. The farther back you are from the danger, the farther you are from the Word, the more confused you are by the stop.

Luke 21:25 - And there shall be signs in the sun, and in the moon, and in the stars; and upon the earth distress of nations, with perplexity; the sea and the waves roaring;

Matthew 24:42 - Watch therefore: for ye know not what hour your Lord doth come.

2 Corinthians 11:3 - But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.

Try not to be confused by the stop. There may be evil all around us in this the final days, but there is one thing that is certain. The Lord God Almighty will prevail.

If little Ashley can look the devil in his face and cast him out in the name of Jesus, what more could the entire Christian nation do on the behalf of the Lord God Almighty in the name of Jesus Christ. Who is there to fear when the Lord God is on your side? The only fear we should have is the reverential fear and awe of the Almighty Lord our God. We must understand that the evil that is running rampant in this world is only doing so because we let it happen. Individually, we can conquer battles much larger than ourselves. So how can we not acknowledge on a greater scale what we can do if we come together in Christ to heal our nation before it’s too late?

Matthew 18:19-20 King James Version (KJV)
19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.
20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

Luke 10:19 - Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you.

Romans 12:19 - Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but [rather] give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance [is] mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.

James 4:7 - Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

I beseech you to no longer be luke warm as time is running out. One foot on the earth gripping earthly treasures and one foot on the stairway looking toward the Heavens. Do not wait until your neighborhood is engulfed in flames before you grab your neighbors hand and tell them about Jesus.

James 3:10-12 - Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.

Revelation 3:15-16
15 I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot.
16 So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

We can again look at Hebrews 4:12 and turn that around to say that the word of God should also be quick and sharp convicting your flesh in order to lead it to repentance. Discerning your thoughts and the intents of your heart and making you realize where changes need to be made. 12. For the word of God [is] quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and [is] a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.